A Glitch In The Black Dad Matrix
The Pink Lipped Brown Skinned Kid, Shaun Flores reporting live from the black political beast. Today we dived in the nursery waters it's really shallow over here. No, I lied we only operate with depth.
Earlier in one of the other blog posts. I spoke of being a dad in what I call the ever-present normalised absent black dad Matrix. I pick my son up from his private nursery every Monday and Tuesday. It is indeed saturated with 99% white children, my son is the only black child. Lighter in his complexion like his father and I am the only black parent. So when I first when to ever pick him up, one of the black female workers said: "I already know who you are here to pick up". I smiled, we found our middle ground. Our middle ground being the united political banner and core of our being. Blackness.
The imposter syndrome was present today, as I walked in with my friend to pick up my son. We are both 6 ft 3. We always get stared at walking down the road. Usually, upon arrival I will press the buzzer, Today instead to my surprise, one of the parents opened the door. As the parent opened the door, the look on his face was comical. He was utterly red pilled, we walked in and the stares were evident. The shock was the shock when I tell people. I am 24 years old. model. actor. master student. Tedx Speaker, but I dress like a quote on quote "road man".
I peeked my head around the corner my son was having his dinner, he is the apple of short-sighted eyes. I caught myself lost staring at him, he sees me as his other little friends always point me out, he looks at me he's smiling, and leaps from his chair running up to me excited, screaming and laughing. These are the moments I undoubtedly live for. To let him know his Dad is here and is here to stay amidst all the toil and tribulation. To see the joy in his face, and the stares remind me, one day at a time we break the societal norm of black fathers not there. Many of us are working to change that narrative that has permeated our childhoods and continues into adulthood.
The parents in the nursery must have been red pilled, as they were red in the face. I can assure you of that. What's funny is that when I walk with him down the road and carry him on my back, or he screams "Daddy, Daddy", its the look on peoples faces. To be fair I do look very young I look like we could be brothers more than anything. Good genes, you know what they say? Blacdoesn'tnt crack.
My son he LOVES DOGS, he starts screaming, so I let him gather his own way around dogs, he is scared and he will say " Daddy come", the dog owner looks bewildered if faces could tell the story.
My lesson today is imposter syndrome is real, but it cannot, will not and should not deter us from white saturated spaces. My son will not grow up to feel inferior, he will grow up to know his skin is greatness. He can wade in the white murky waters and come out still proud in his blackness. He is not any less black because he's around white people. He carries his culture and his father's name and legacy proud like the curls upon his head.
Hopefully, he won't experience what I experienced being apparently "white-sounding". Oh you sound educated that equates to white, I understand the history, however, based on the current knowledge I now have thanks to the hunger for knowledge. I will be able to educate him and help him navigate in the world.
Dad's you are so important.
Dad's you are soo special.
Dad's you are crucial.
Dad's you are amazing
Dad's you are needed.
Hate can not drive out hate, only love can do that.
Let us love our children!
Raise our sons with love
The Pink Lipped Brown Skinned Kid
Earlier in one of the other blog posts. I spoke of being a dad in what I call the ever-present normalised absent black dad Matrix. I pick my son up from his private nursery every Monday and Tuesday. It is indeed saturated with 99% white children, my son is the only black child. Lighter in his complexion like his father and I am the only black parent. So when I first when to ever pick him up, one of the black female workers said: "I already know who you are here to pick up". I smiled, we found our middle ground. Our middle ground being the united political banner and core of our being. Blackness.
The imposter syndrome was present today, as I walked in with my friend to pick up my son. We are both 6 ft 3. We always get stared at walking down the road. Usually, upon arrival I will press the buzzer, Today instead to my surprise, one of the parents opened the door. As the parent opened the door, the look on his face was comical. He was utterly red pilled, we walked in and the stares were evident. The shock was the shock when I tell people. I am 24 years old. model. actor. master student. Tedx Speaker, but I dress like a quote on quote "road man".
I peeked my head around the corner my son was having his dinner, he is the apple of short-sighted eyes. I caught myself lost staring at him, he sees me as his other little friends always point me out, he looks at me he's smiling, and leaps from his chair running up to me excited, screaming and laughing. These are the moments I undoubtedly live for. To let him know his Dad is here and is here to stay amidst all the toil and tribulation. To see the joy in his face, and the stares remind me, one day at a time we break the societal norm of black fathers not there. Many of us are working to change that narrative that has permeated our childhoods and continues into adulthood.
The parents in the nursery must have been red pilled, as they were red in the face. I can assure you of that. What's funny is that when I walk with him down the road and carry him on my back, or he screams "Daddy, Daddy", its the look on peoples faces. To be fair I do look very young I look like we could be brothers more than anything. Good genes, you know what they say? Blacdoesn'tnt crack.
My son he LOVES DOGS, he starts screaming, so I let him gather his own way around dogs, he is scared and he will say " Daddy come", the dog owner looks bewildered if faces could tell the story.
My lesson today is imposter syndrome is real, but it cannot, will not and should not deter us from white saturated spaces. My son will not grow up to feel inferior, he will grow up to know his skin is greatness. He can wade in the white murky waters and come out still proud in his blackness. He is not any less black because he's around white people. He carries his culture and his father's name and legacy proud like the curls upon his head.
Hopefully, he won't experience what I experienced being apparently "white-sounding". Oh you sound educated that equates to white, I understand the history, however, based on the current knowledge I now have thanks to the hunger for knowledge. I will be able to educate him and help him navigate in the world.
Dad's you are so important.
Dad's you are soo special.
Dad's you are crucial.
Dad's you are amazing
Dad's you are needed.
Hate can not drive out hate, only love can do that.
Let us love our children!
Raise our sons with love
The Pink Lipped Brown Skinned Kid
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